Randomly on Thursday

1.Today is Holy Thursday,  as part of our preparation for Easter Sunday we will commemorate the Last Supper in a special way at church tonight. First we will read Exodus 12:1-8, 11-14, Psalms 116:12-13, 15-18, 1 Corinthians 11:23-26, and John 13:1-15. Then the priest will wash the feet of some of the parishioners ( in a parish as larges as ours it would be impractical for everyone to have their feet washed so usually it is members of various volunteer groups). It is a time for us to reflect on the importance of the Holy Eucharist and on our service to one another (and the world at large) as brothers and sisters in Christ in imitation of our Savior. The altar is stripped bare and the statues removed, we depart in silence, all that is left is the core of our faith: Christ crucified  for our sins to rise again on Easter Sunday morn defying death and becoming our salvation.

2. We are hosting Easter Sunday supper this year, which means Nana and I will be frantically trying to get the house "company clean".

3. The weather was so nice today, Nana and the Bumper spent the whole afternoon outside.

4. I opened all the windows to let in the Springtime air and drive out the mustiness of winter.

5. There will be very little crafting or writing getting done over the next few days unless I am determined to get up very early or go to be very late.

Kim

Wordless Wednesday - November Garden

The Bumper grew this herself

November Rose

Lots of yummy greens

Pretty in pink

Just Tired

I am tired.
I am tired of the "Mommy wars" - seriously are there not bigger problems in the world?
I am tired of being asked when I am going back to work. Truth is I don't know - I am enjoying being at home with the Bumper and I would like to find a way to earn a living from home.
I am tired of being asked when I am going to wean the Bumper. Truth is I don't know -- We have both been through a lot in the past year and we have had a lot of trauma and drama. The last thing I want to do is upset her further by abruptly cutting her off from her only consistent form of comfort before she is ready.
I am tired of the Bumper testing me at every turn. I know she is only 2 and a half, but can't Mommy get a break?
I am tired of being asked when I am going to get a divorce. Things are really complicated right now and I don't have a ready answer.
I am tired of my Christian friends asking me when I am just going to forgive the Bumper's dad and get back together like God intended. Wow! I am so glad they have a mainline on what God is thinking and wants for me -- I sure wish I did! Oh and last time I checked marriage was a sacred covenant, an equal partnership, not an excuse for abuse.
I am tired of being the good one, taking the Bumper to visit while her dad is sick-- sometimes I feel like I want revenge for all of the meanness. Sigh -- I know vengeance is mine says the Lord.
I am tired of not having enough time to get everything done in a day -- the housework, resume posting, job searching, taking care of the Bumper, writing on my new novel, crochet and pleasure reading.
I am tired of being tired - I want an uninterrupted eight hours of sleep -- for several nights!
WAH-WAH-WAH-
Sometimes I just need to vent. On the days when I feel like this I try to take some time out and pray, read the Bible or just count to ten and remind myself I can start me day over anytime I want.
I will be back to regular posting soon. I have a lot of things I want to write about, it is just a matter of writing them down.
Today I have found Psalms 39, 40 and 70 quite encouraging.
Blessings
 Kim

Living Simply or Simply Living

What does living simply mean? What does living plainly mean? What does homemaking mean? I have, thanks to Rhoda Jean, over at Down to Earth (http://down---to---earth.blogspot.com/) been thinking a lot about this.

When I first got married I had a certain notion of what a homemaker did, and I researched, read blogs, and came up with plans and strategies to implement my vision. When things finally seemed to be falling into place in that regard, the rest of my marriage fell apart and I found myself a refugee at my Mom's house. Well a year later I am redefining what it means for me to be a homemaker. I find myself looking at the word quite literally - to make a home.  I am in the process of doing just that. I am making a home for the Bumper and myself. I am learning the art of being and adult child living at home. I have discovered that is not so much about how well I keep the house clean, although that is important, but more about the little ways I make sure we are comfortable and content. It is about the mealtimes, the story times, the bath times and bedtimes. It is about taking the time to play with the Bumper, to teach the Bumper and to discipline the Bumper. It is about keeping the door open and creating a welcoming, loving atmosphere for family and friends. For me being a homemaker means creating a home regardless of where I live.

I will cover simple living and plain living in another post.

I am going on vacation this week. We are traveling to see Nana's family in St. Louis MO. This will be the first time the Bumper has gone on an extended car trip. I am going to try and keep posting  will on vacation, but I will see how it goes. I will be back for sure next Wednesday.

Blessings,

Kim

I am Currently Thinking About This, That and the Other

 

This past week I have been struggling with some things in the personal arena. Mostly with the nature of forgiveness, and what it really means to forgive and forget. Forgiveness, for me at least means not letting the hurt someone has caused fester in my soul. Forgetting? That is more difficult.  I remember the events that caused the hurt and with good reason, remembering prevents me from putting myself back in the same position. I can choose to let go of the bitterness and anger, much easier to do when it is a toddler throwing a tantrum, than an adult. I think I have managed to find a balance and the serenity feels good.

In that spirit of serenity I am currently thinking of all the little things that a bring me joy.

A bed that is made with a few rumples and lumps because the Bumper wanted to help me with the morning work.

A glass of tea and some quiet crochet time.

A bright blue summer sky.

A jar of homemade apple butter given to me by a friend.

Snuggling up with the Bumper to read a bedtime story.

Such little moments give me such great joy, even in the midst of trial.

Have a good weekend.

Blessings,

Kim

Just Thinking - The Three P's

Patience, Practice and Perseverance. I am just learning to crochet. My February goal was to knit a granny square. The picture shows how far I've gotten. So far it looks more like an octagon than a square.*grin*  I hope I will soon be able to post a picture of a competed square.
Yet it occurs to me that the tree P's can be put to use in every area of my life.

When Matt and I decided I would stay home with the bumper, I really had no idea what I would be getting into.
How hard could keeping house be? Just do the chores and go along my merry way.  I thought I would have plenty of time for writing, and all the crafts I have been longing to try. Well the bumper has proven to be a lot of work. I am on 24/7. It is hard work with a capital W! I am learning to be patient with myself and with the bumper, especially on days when my nerves are frazzled. I am practicing the skills I need to be a better homemaker. Some days I feel like need to take a cleaning 101 course!  I am persevering in changing my attitude. I am actively looking for the joys and blessings of the everyday. I have to remind myself that no matter how seemingly dull, boring, or unimportant., even the smallest thing when done with a grateful heart is pleasing  to God.

The Journey Begins

I made the leap. Today was my first day as a stay at home wife and mom to be. My little jumper has yet to make her arrival on the scene. For months I have been reading various blogs and exploring websites, trying to get a handle on what it means to be a "sahm". What I did not count on was the urge to simply sit and veg-out ( and I don't mean eating lots of leafy greens). Sure I tidied, and did laundry, but mostly I surfed the web and played solitaire. Yeah that is going to get really old really fast, so I guess I need to put what I have been learning into practice. First things first: Get Organized!

I will be the first to admit that I am not organized at all. There is something within me that rebels at the very notion of constant organization. (I am so the opposite of the hubby -- he has spreadsheets for everything).

If any of you out there in blog land have suggestions, I am Listening!