Valentines Day

For all you you who have someone to love:

Mother, Father, Sister, Brother, Son , Daughter, Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, Friends Sweethearts, Husbands, and Wives. Cherish them each and every day. God Loves You.

For all of you who think you are alone: God Loves You Too.

Happy Valentines Day

Kim

One Day at a Time.

I had a good cry today. I just let it all out and sobbed until my throat was raw. The poor little bumper did not like seeing her mama so upset, and she tried to give me a hug. When I felt better I was able to take her for a walk in the backyard at my mother's place. The bumper had such fun chasing all the stray cats! Tonight I am going to pray for peace. I know God will show me what to do, but I need to be willing to listen.

Strange but True

I went to my first Domestic Violence group therapy session tonight. I felt so awkward and strange. I nearly burst into tears at hearing my story come out of the mouths of the other women there. Similar to 12step programs there is a camaraderie that forms out of having the same kind of experiences. I know two things for sure: I have been the victim of verbal abuse and I am not alone.

Speaking my Truth

When I started this blog I had high hopes of writing of the ordinary joys and sorrows of middle –class homemaker. I envisioned posts about writing poetry, my growing baby girl, my crafts and hobbies, baking, housekeeping, and my walk with Jesus. However I have found my self in a verbally and emotionally abusive marriage. I still want to blog, but I have to be truthful. My entries may be painful to write, and painful to read, but they will be real.

I hope by sharing my experience I can be of service to others in similar situations.

Yours in Christ
Kim

One Day

In one day a life can change forever.

Letter to Marie on her First Birthday

December 6, 2011

Dear Marie,

One year ago at 9:35pm you were born. You came early, you were not supposed to be born until December 23^rd. I guess you just couldn’t wait to see the world. The moment your father put you into my arms and I heard your cries, and seeing your tiny fingers grip mine, I knew I faced no greater responsibility and joy than being your mother. I was so scared; here you were so small and helpless. You needed me for everything and I didn’t know where to begin. I was so worried I would make so many mistakes; I wanted to be the best mother I could for you.

 Well here we are one year later and it has been a wonderful, challenging, wild ride. I did make plenty of mistakes, but in spite of my worries and fears you grew and thrived. You went from a mewling infant to a headstrong toddler. You have the sweetest smile and the most stubborn temper! I have watched you struggle to figure things out (You were determined to crawl in your own way) and had the pleasure of seeing you succeed. My heart broke every time you fell and bumped your head and it sang every time you mastered a new skill. As you leave babyhood behind I face the challenge of finding the balance between sheltering you and letting go. This past year I have witnessed you learn to hold up your head, then roll, then scoot, then crawl and now you run. I have seen your first smile, heard your first laugh and felt your first hug. It is my prayer for you that God will allow you to continue to grow healthy and strong in mind, body and spirit in the next year.

I am looking forward to growing with you.

Love,

Mama

Home Again

M, the Bumper, and I just got back from our first ever family vacation. We went to Skyline Drive in the beautiful Shenandoah Valley. We were right on time for all the wonderful fall colors and brisk weather. It was so peaceful and still and calming. M and I learned quite a bit about taking a little one on an extended trip. I will be posting pictures in a day or two. In the meantime I am enjoying being home and getting back to our routine.

God Bless
Kim