Mercy and Forgiveness

I don't believe in coincidences, so when the last three sermons at church were on mercy and forgiveness I figured God must be trying to get me to pay attention. So I did. I have not been merciful or forgiving. I have been on my pity pot crying woe is me. I tallied up all of M's faults, every unkind word, every rude action, every slight real or imagined, and held the against him. I never said anything out loud, oh no, to do so would have been to admit to my own faults, failings and mistakes. It takes two two argue, but I was not willing to see that. Then last Sunday in the middle of the sermon I finally got it. God's mercy and forgiveness are freely given, they are not dependant on our actions. God's mercy and forgiveness are there for M whether I think he deserves it or not. It is not up to me. It is up to God. So I handed our marriage over to God. I forgave.

You know what? I am feeling better and our marriage is doing better.

Kim

Crochet - Show and Tell is on my mind

Ok. Way back in  February I made up my mind to learn how to crochet. I am a complete beginner and started at the begining. Here is what I have been able to make so far:

A complete granny square! Yay!

I have also made a little hat for my daughter, of which I can't seem to find a picture. I am so very excited about my new hobby. It feels so good to make something with my hands. I am currently working on a baby blanket, and I am looking forward to wrapping the bumper up on cold winter days. I hope to have more pictures soon. I am headed to the Shenandoah Fiber Festival for a good ogle at all the pretty hand dyed yarns. I will be taking lots of pictures. Have a good weekend every one.

Teeth, Trantrums, and Toddling

 My little bumper has her first teeth. They were such an awful long time coming in, and they hurt her so very much the poor little mite, but now they are here! To coincide with the arrival of her teeth, the bumper has started throwing temper tantrums. Her crying is now about what she wants as well as what she needs. Lucky me I get to figure it out *grin*. The other big news around our household is that she is regularly cruising the the furniture. She just learned to crawl a month ago, and now she is trying to walk. This would not be alarming except that the bumper has developed a fondness for all things paper. She loves books, and eats them every chance she gets. 

I have some crochet projects I plan to share soon, my first efforts with my new hobby!

Kim

A Quick Note

I'm just popping in to say I'll be back. I have had had some things going on in my life that have kept me from feeling like blogging., but nextday or two I have some things I want to share. See you soon
Kim

Wedding Bells

This weekend is my sister's bridal shower, and I am very excited. My sister's friends have been working really hard to put this together. I live 3hours away, and with a new baby I wasn't able to help much, except to run interference, which my sister assured me was needed! It promises to be a lot of fun and I hope to have pictures when I get back.

It is Raining

August 14, 2011 – It is Raining

 Last week my little bumper was sick, this week my husband has been fighting a sinus infection, and I seem to be coming down with something. Today is a wet and rainy Sunday, and I am not feeling very chipper. In fact as I write this I am close to tears. Thing between my husband and myself are quite strained at the moment. We are both in Recovery programs, but lately we seem to be stalled. The first step in recovery is to admit you are powerless and that your life is unmanageable. Well sitting in my living room, looking around at the piles of junk mail, boxes and things that do not have a home I would have to say my life is pretty unmanageable. To tackle this I signed up for “Fly Lady”, I have seen progress, but it is not enough for my husband. Apparently I am not progressing fast enough.  I do not know how to clean or keep house, these are skills I have to learn, and it is a steep learning curve. I also have trouble communicating; I grew up in a household where people didn’t talk so much to each other as at each other. I do not know how to adequately express my needs, wants or feelings. I have trouble being intimate; according to my husband I am cold. My husband is not talking to me. He hasn’t for the last two days. I feel hurt and manipulated. He says I don’t talk to him, that I do this kind of thing all the time. But I don’t ignore him when he asks me a direct question, I don’t pretend he isn’t there.  I have been praying about my situation, but right now God seems very far away. I hope to write about happier things soon, but this is where I am right now and I felt like I needed to get it off my chest. Besides no-one is reading my blog anyway.

Quick Note

Funny thing about having a kid. If the bumper gets sick we all get sick!

I'l be back when we are feeling better. I hope those of ou who read my blog have a wonderful weekend.

Kim